Despite nearly everything from both Jesus and the apostles it seems that the American church has whole heartedly embraced a notion that the cross of Jesus Christ means I won’t have to suffer. When suffering comes we cry out that somehow God has violated our terms of service.

I think I am pretty normal. I want things easy, especially my Christian life. I want success quickly, often and cleanly. I egotistically imagine for myself all kinds of triumphs and any suffering involved in these triumphs I like to keep strictly theoretical.

One of the most frustrating thing about a sovereign God is that he is not compliant to my wishes or demands. One of the most beautiful things about Jesus is that he did not exclude himself from suffering but instead tells us “you will suffer, but I will go first.”

It is truly my own egotism that gives me the gall to demand that Jesus’ suffering implies my exclusion from it. He invites us into his suffering, which the apostles willingly accepted. I have a ways to go.

Despite the sacrifice of Jesus I really don’t want to believe the cost by which the world is saved. I want it on the cheap. I want it within the clean lines of my expectations. I want it within a convenient time table. I want Easter without Good Friday. It cannot be done. If I could, the Father would have given his Son a different answer in Gethsemane. pvk